How Do You Say, "Sucks to be you!" in Spanish?

Ah, futbol. A game of inches. Chilean team Universidad de Concepcion beat O'Higgins, which is somehow another Chilean team. In stoppage time at the end of the game, down 2-1, O'Higgins' keeper clears the ball down the field, hoping for one shot at the tying score.

It did not work out as planned.

Hey, Look at That!

The 2016 Wildlife Photography Comedy Awards have been given out. Check out the gallery to see all of the animals that didn't make the cover of National Geographic.

I Saw Beautiful Things Today

I served as a Poll Watcher today. This is a small and insignificant part of American politics, where each party can send observers to voting locations to watch that the election laws are being scrupulously followed to neither deny anyone their rightful vote nor to permit anyone to vote illegally. I spent roughly half the day in each of two locations, both of which had two precincts voting. One was on the edge of a prestigious private university and the other was in the most ethnically diverse region of the city.

And I saw beautiful things today.

I stood in the dark of a November morning and looked up at mighty Orion standing in the crystal clear sky.

I saw two college women waiting twenty minutes before the polls opened, so that one could attest to the other's residency in the precinct.

I saw a couple who had come from Somalia as refugees and who had been naturalized in July proudly wave their ballots over their heads as they walked across the room while everyone in the polling place, including the officials, stood and applauded.

I saw text messages from a friend monitoring another precinct telling me about a ninety-year-old woman and a 107 year-old man casting their votes.

I saw college students take their first step toward running this country by voting for the first time.

I saw couples of every gender combination hug and kiss after voting together.

I saw election officials white and black, liberal and conservative, do everything within the law to make it possible for people to register.

I saw people who couldn't produce the proper documentation come back, after having gone home to dig for what was needed.

I saw a middle-aged Hmong man smiling as though he would explode with joy after casting the first ballot of his life.

I saw people of all colors, national origins, and religions standing patiently together as they waited in line.

I saw two gay men proudly say that they now had the same last name as the poll worker looked them up on the roll of voters.

I saw two observers from the Organization for Security and Cooperation in Europe (OSCE) watching American democracy, so that they can make recommendations and comments.

I saw two dozen people put aside their lives to calmly and patiently scan, sort, examine, and explain more than a thousand times all of the details needed to register and check in voters and to give them their ballots.

And when I walked across the street to an Arabic grocery to stretch my legs and grab a bottle of mango juice and some baklavas, the owner called me brother as we chatted about the beautiful weather.

Today, I saw the things that make me proud to be an American.

Great Moments in Product Design

So, on Wednesday, Aphrodite and I were invited to the elementary school where our kids had gone to speak to the students about our careers as engineers. These were pre-kindergarten through fifth-grade students, fairly evenly divided.

Aphrodite, being who she is, gave an excellent talk on Test Engineering, with photos and videos. Me, being me, did a design exercise on how to build a bug catcher. The kids were good and had lots of good ideas (way too many, but that's typical of adult design exercises, too).

One boy, probably in kindergarten, proceeded to give me the single best design that I'll ever hear. He politely raised his hand and waited until he was called upon. When it was his turn to speak, he very precisely described how, if you wish to catch spiders, you need a bowl with steep sides about this high (using his fingers to indicate about an inch). You set this on the floor and then you place a dead hand in the middle and all the spiders will come and be trapped in the bowl.

A dead hand?

Yes. Spiders are really attracted to dead hands.

Several other students solemnly agreed that dead hands worked especially well for spiders, His teacher was frantically trying not to laugh out loud. I looked at him as he stood seriously looking back at me, waiting for feedback, and said, "I'll be sure to get the test engineers working on that, but I think that we may have trouble getting it past Product Compliance and the Branding departments."

He nodded knowingly and we continued the exercise.

I've Wondered About That, Myself

Literalature

Have you ever seen a title and said to yourself, "I wonder what that's all about?"

If you read this blog, I know you have.

The editors of the Wyoming Legacy Love Inspired Historical novel series apparently worried mightily about confusing their readers with fancy titles that include metaphors and allusions. As I was walking through Half Price Books, I came across the novel seen below, held in your author's massive mitt. The first thing that you'll notice is the title: The Wrangler's Inconvenient Wife. Come on, Darling, tell me how you really feel about me.

Oh, wait! There's the subtitle: She's the wife he never wanted.

Ouch.

I do like the cover photo, which has been nicely hit with a very light Photoshop painting plug-in. Of course, it's a little tough to tell if that's the wife or the reason that the wife is inconvenient. The horses seem equally fond of each other.

Being an inconvenient spouse in the back country was an unhealthy way of life. People tended to die of various infectious diseases back then and once buried, disinterring them wasn't generally considered a good idea.

Despite the almost overwhelming temptation to spend a dollar and actually read the thing, I resisted.

On the same trip, I saw that someone had taken the display copy of The Conan Compendium and had left a tossed-aside copy of Crime and Punishment on the pile. Sorry, Vertikles, but it's Robert E. Howard 1, Fyodor Dostoevsky 0.

VIPDUCK

Man, two long, serious postings. It's time for a break. Here's an example of random brilliance. That's when you're walking along and you see something totally cool that has no business being there.

Hey, Look at That!

The 2016 Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards have been given out. Head over to check out all of the animals that don't grace the covers of National Geographic.